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Published at Tuesday, February 12th, 2019 - 09:06:46 AM. Dream Home. By .

Home Building Dream Blues - Where Have Your Dream Home Visions Gone? : Is the thought of building your custom home just a distant memory now? Have you dismissed the notion of that major home remodel? Does the economy have you barricading your wishes, hunkering down and waiting it out in resignation? So where do our dreams go when things turn sour? In times like this, optimism and growth tend to get pummeled by bad news. Verbal clutter, dire predictions and worried feelings overwhelm us. The dream doesnt vanish, it just gets buried in the deluge. Our homes are central to our lives, Yet, the love we hold for our homes and the desires we hold to create a comfortable nest remain. For a time, you may need to tuck away a particular vision you have for your home until the next opportunity comes or is created. What can you do in the meantime? Plan! Prepare! Learn! What Ive found in my years in the business is that if we allow our home dreams to languish completely out of mind, they die off and resignation sets in. I dont want that to happen to you ... if you truly want to make that dream home a reality. Homebuilding requires specific preparation. Sports teams practice for weeks before the season starts. Business convention organizers prepare tirelessly for weeks and months prior to the event. Long trips are scheduled out well in advance for places to stay, sights to see, and people to visit. Building or remodeling requires even more preparation for the best results. And Im talking about well before you have even set a date for your project! Planning, preparation, and learning are the keys to your success. Use the down time to get yourself ready and keep the dream alive. * Plan: Some have been planning all their lives. But when I ask them for specifics, it almost always falls short of planning and amounts to little more than wishing. Plan! What specifically do you want in your home? Where do you really want to live? How do you want to be involved? Make an extensive list, prioritize it, whittle it down and make some decisions! * Prepare: This is where you can get more specific. Im talking about preparations that precede the actual homebuilding preparations. This is time to lay some groundwork for the future. Prepare! If you dont have a building lot, find one. If you dont have a house plan, research and choose one. If you dont have good enough credit, fix it. * Learn: Successful homebuilding and remodeling experiences do not happen by accident. I mean the type of success where you get the home you want, all the goodies you want, at a fair price and you thoroughly enjoy the process. Education is critical. Learn! Go online. Read books. Talk to builders and contractors. Talk to architects. Talk to friends in the business. Become insatiable and learn everything you can. I really want your custom house dreams to flourish. Own it! I mean own the dream before you own that house. Dont let the outside world stop you. When circumstances outside of your control try to smother your hopes, take action. Push those dreams back up to top of mind awareness and use the time to your advantage.

Visualise Your Dream Home : I devised this exercise some years ago when I needed to find a new home. Id just attended a workshop on creating your own reality and was greatly taken with what Id learned so I carefully noted down everything I wanted in my dream home and then set about trying to find it. No one was more astonished than I when a few weeks later I was offered a house to rent that not only ticked every box -- when I checked my blueprint I saw I had inadvertently written down telephone line twice, and the house had two telephone lines running to it. This is a powerful exercise! The technique can be used for a range of possibilities but, for the purposes of the illustration, Ive chosen a dream home. You will need some paper and a pen or pencil and, initially, an hour or so of uninterrupted time. But this is an on-going exercise, something you can keep adding to until youre completely satisfied with the end result. Whats crucial to success is identifying the limiting beliefs most of us hold that we cant have what we want, that we dont deserve it, that its not possible. Thats the hard part -- but help is at hand. Start by writing My Dream Home in the centre of the page and drawing around it a circle, a heart, whatever takes your fancy. Now youre going to sketch in lines leading out from the centre, like a star burst, and write down all the things you want in your dream home. You can start by writing down basics like electricity and gas supply, mains sewerage, telephone line, or you can assume those are going to be there anyway. Are you going to own this home or rent it? Write down things like freehold or good landlord and affordable rent. Do you like sleek and modern or something more traditional? Is it important that your home is well insulated, has central heating, double glazed windows? Write that down. How many bedrooms will it have? And why do you want that number? If you want one as an office or a workroom, could you as easily have a dining room that doubles up? Are you trying to fill your needs for both now and in the longer term? Is this home going to last you forever or are you creating something for now, knowing that as your needs change youll be able to create another dream home? (Youre going to have to answer an awful lot of questions to get clear about what you want, but its going to be worth it. You cant get what you want until you get clear about what you want.) When youre quite clear about how many bedrooms write it down. Do you want a separate dining room and kitchen or would you prefer them combined? Write it down. What kind of kitchen do you want? What will it have in it? Washing machine? Tumble dryer? Would you prefer a separate utility room? Write it down. Do you love cooking or are you someone who does the absolute minimum on that front? Will you need lots of equipment or very little? A breakfast bar or the kind of large kitchen table that everyone can sit around? This is your dream youre creating here and you make up the rules as you go along. If you find yourself thinking Ill never be able to afford that, keep reminding yourself this is a game, this is a dream youre creating ... for now! This is what I mean by letting down your walls of belief. Doing this exercise not only helps you get clear about what you like and what you want, it also helps you get in touch with those beliefs that stop you being who you really are and getting what you really want. The more work you do on this the greater are your chances of success because youre also working on your subconscious, giving it encouraging affirmations, wiping the old negative tapes and replacing them with new, positive ones. When you get to the point where youve had enough for now, stop. Youre doing some really hard work here and you need to acknowledge that. Were generally much better at quantifying physical work than mental effort and its important not to overdo things at this stage otherwise youll end up exhausted, especially at the beginning. Put it to one side and come back to it later but try and set aside a brief time each day, or perhaps three times a week, to keep working on your blueprint. As your vision grows start imagining yourself in your dream home, walking around it, looking at each room. How do you feel? Are you comfortable? Does it reflect who you are, who youd like to be? What colours predominate? Lush, rich colours or something more subtle? Are there carpets, wooden floors, rugs and runners? Is it full of things, a cosy, family home or is it elegant and minimalist? What do the doors look like, the walls, the lights? If you change your mind about something as your vision develops thats fine. Just change it on your blueprint. It doesnt matter how messy it gets. You can always do a neater version as you get more clarity. Are there any absolute essentials you couldnt live without? Do you need to be near public transport, within easy reach of the shops, close to people you care for or care about? Would you prefer to be out in the countryside or in the middle of a town? Are you passionate about the sea and dream of living within sight of it? Dont listen to the voice that says in your dreams. Write it down. Is your dream home somewhere hot and sunny, a retirement home abroad, perhaps? Just put yourself in that place, imagine it, smell the scents, see the colours and create your home in the local style. Is there anyone else to take into consideration, other members of the family, family pets? Its probably easier to do this exercise if youre doing it just for you but Im assuming your dream home will accommodate what family you have so I guess you might have to make a few compromises. If a husband needs a garden shed to take refuge in, a garage to store assorted paraphernalia, build it into your blueprint. If the kids need somewhere to store their bikes, if the rabbit needs some grass, put it all down. Is there a dog that needs exercising -- do you need to be near to a common area? Do you want a garden? How big will it be? Whos going to maintain it? Will there be hedges, fences, walls? Are you bothered about being overlooked, about privacy or would you be happy having neighbours you can chat to over the fence? Will there be a vegetable plot or just flowers and shrubs -- what kind? Put it all down. Something that needs to emerge through doing this exercise is a sense of responsibility for what youre creating -- and thats a tricky one. On the one hand Im saying go for whatever your want while on the other Im saying you have to take responsibility for what you create. But theres no point in dreaming up a home like something out of Footballers Wives if youve got small children which means youll have to cover up the swimming pool and spend all your time picking up their toys in a vast garden. It doesnt make sense to want a large garden with a vegetable patch if no one in the family has ever picked up a trowel, or to want an elegant, minimalist home youve seen in a classy magazine when you know youre really untidy and perfectly happy with that. You need to be realistic. This dream home has to be in line with your values and what you want out of life. Keep working on your blueprint until youre confident youve covered every possible detail. Then start putting energy into moving towards that dream. What are you going to need to do to move you closer? What are you going to have to let go of? The most important consequence of doing this exercise is gaining clarity about who you are and what you want. We so often spend our lives vaguely dissatisfied, not sure what we want but quite sure that we dont want what weve got. Ultimately you may end up taking a few tiny steps to bring your dream into reality -- clearing out stuff you no longer need, changing the use of a room from, say, a bedroom into a workroom or office. Or you might move on in huge leaps and acquire exactly what you wished for (even down to that second telephone line!) You may decide youre not quite ready for such major change, that there are other issues to resolve first. Thats also fine. You might want to put your blueprint away for a while and come back to it in six months, a year. It just might astonish you to look at it after that time and see that some of the things you wrote down have appeared, as though by magic. You see, once you get really clear about what you want, what you want tends to find you!



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